Why are we so quick to beat ourselves up? To criticise ourselves, to judge ourselves, to tell ourselves off?
Why are we so eager to cut down on sleep, to take on extra responsibilities, to push ourselves into exhaustion?
I LOVE jumping in at the deep end and pushing past boundaries and self employment brought me so many! New challenges, new projects, new skills to learn. “Feel the fear and do it anyway.” Whipping myself to carry on and do even more.
Well, yes. Continue reading
I have been chatting to Red magazine about strengths or positive qualities. And how concentrating on our strengths increases self confidence.
Often schools and job appraisals focus on our weakest areas and where we need to improve, not on our strongest areas. Yet it’s often true that we would need to put in a significant effort to raise a weakness to a mediocre level. Whereas putting in the same effort to an area of strength can raise a strength to an expertise. Continue reading
is a little voice
in the back of your head
that tells you
~ Michael Gervais
I’ve been inspired to offer something to fund raise for a 18 year old girl Danielle and her gap year volunteering. I am offering coaching sessions to those who make a charitable donation to Danielle’s fundraising for her trip to Chile. Continue reading
Do you hear a little voice telling you that you’re not […] enough or that you’re not […] enough?
Ever considered that it is a lie?
What if you ARE enough? Continue reading
So now what?
I’ve realised I lack self confidence, so now what?
Clients (and strangers) ask me this. I wonder if they hope that I have a pink pill, or even a hypodermic syringe. Some magic and instant solution. Continue reading
I’m speaking at this year’s Greenbelt Festival.
If you’re at Greenbelt, come and join my Self Confidence for women workshop.
See you there!
UPDATE: I spoke at Greenbelt and 137 women explored self confidence and discussed how to say “No”. I’m in touch with a number of them and had some writeups. It was wonderful to discuss the difference between working out what others expect of us (particularly bosses and adult children) and what we actually want to give. What are our boundaries?
I recently wrote about facing fears. How often do we tell ourselves we can do nothing?
This girl addressed the UN about the environment… Continue reading
Self confidence – what are the keys to self confidence? Those that have subscribed to my newsletter will have received two articles on the keys to self confidence.
Firstly, knowing who you are, what are your strengths, what matters to you and what you want in life. Part of this is setting boundaries and being able and willing to say “no”.
Secondly, knowing where you are heading and setting goals in order to get there.
Facing fears is a necessary part of setting boundaries and also moving forward towards your goals. I’ve noticed a correlation in my willingness to move beyond my comfort zones and the speed at which I move forward.
I fear heights – so recently went abseiling. Continue reading
‘We don’t see things as they are;
we see things as we are.’
~ Anais Nin
Wow, what a powerful quotation. If we want to change something, or change the way we see something, we need to change ourselves.
Pick a situation that is challenging you right now. Don’t go for the biggest one just yet, perhaps a smaller challenge.
Secondly, imagine you are someone else. Perhaps a wise old woman, or a young rebel or a civil rights campaigner. Take a few minutes to imagine what it would be like to live as this person.
Thirdly, look at the challenge through that other person’s eyes. What do you notice? What becomes possible from this point of view? How does this affect your self confidence?What action do you want to take?
Let me know your thoughts on this below. Whose perspective will you choose?
Lack of self confidence delayed almost half who escaped corporate rat race – result of survey Continue reading
Biggest challenge to professional women is self confidence, feeling an impostor in their role – result of my interviews
I interviewed about 30 women about the challenges they face in their work in corporate roles and also in their personal lives. Continue reading
So why self confidence?
I’ve been carrying out interviews of career women this year. I’ve asked them about the challenges they face. I’ll tell you more about the results in a future issue.
It affects us all
The theme of self confidence came up time and time again. Worded as the ability to talk about your success in the same way as your male colleagues. Or believing in your abilities. Or fear of failure holding you back. Some women feel like impostors who risk being found out.
I have been wanting to write in my newsletter and it has been near the top of my to-do list for longer than I care to admit. I’ve been wanting to talk to you about my relaunch as ‘Self Confidence for Women’ which you will have noticed.
Putting things off
So why the procrastination?
I’m learning not to beat myself up at times like these. There’s usually a reason for procrastination, often a good one. I’ve spent a bit of time sitting with this and being curious. (Something I’d recommend for something you are putting off). Continue reading